Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Poor Tiger

The reason for the following rant is the constant discussion I've been hearing about Tiger Woods, mostly from the male perspective. Since I live in a house of all males- two of which my conversations are limited to "please stop that" and "are you sure you don't have to pee?"- I decided that I need an outlet to other adults in order to share my thoughts on the subject. I should probably add a disclaimer here, as my thoughts may offend some,but here goes....

Tiger's story of infidelity in inescapable. The constant commentary on whether he is truly sorry, and sincere is sickening. I must admit, it is refreshing that most people find his actions deplorable. However, there are those out there who feel the need to defend him. Some explain that his actions are justified because he is in a position of power that made him feel that the rules didn't apply to him (his own words, actually). My question here would be, why get married then? Doesn’t marriage in itself create these rules which wouldn’t apply? Had Tiger been a single guy that participated in numerous romps with various women, I would say, good for him. The fact that he did this while married creates an entirely different sentiment.

There is also the view that "men are just wired differently" and they simply can't resist temptation the way women do. I am not naive to the fact that women and men are different. I also don't believe women have special powers of resistance. Just ask a woman who has a chocolate bar within close proximity. Temptation can cause weakness in anyone, but when giving in to that temptation would cause harm to those around them, I am of the biased opinion that a women would use that fact as a tool to help them restrain themselves. Using the excuse that men are "wired differently" could only imply that their brains are wired directly to their penis, and while one is functioning, the other cannot.

As far as the defense that he is a sex addict, I'm not really buying it in this case. I understand that there are people who suffer from addiction to various things. Most commonly you hear of chemical addiction, such as those to drugs and alcohol. I am not out to disprove that sex addiction is a real condition for some, but it seems more likely that it is used as a scapegoat by those who are not truly "sufferers" of the affliction. From what I know of most true addictions, the dependency completely overrides the person's ability to go without it. I would have to think that the need for sex or at least the inability to have sex whenever desired, wouldn't generally end in the sufferer hitting rock bottom- i.e. losing jobs, families, homes as is so often seen with other types of addictions. The exception would be those who are married and get caught in situations of infidelity. The effects can be detrimental to a family. The danger in having the option of being a sex addict is the addiction aspect only comes into play when someone wants something they can blame their actions on. They are suddenly sick and stricken with the effects of a disease. Sex addiction seems to overwhelmingly affect those who feel entitled to pleasure. I would suggest that the condition be downgraded to something more like “The Me Syndrome”.

Another interesting aspect of Tiger’s story, are the women with which he had his affairs. These women should be considered enablers. It’s not as if Tiger Woods is a man one could meet and not know who he was. These women were not “duped” into carrying on an affair with a married man. One woman actually sought out the legal representation of attorney Gloria Allred; notoriously know for hunting down and suing rich men. She claims to have been devastated by the affair, and even lost her career over it. Allred claimed that Tiger Woods owed her client an apology, and should have mentioned her by name in his public statement last week. Given the sheer number of women he had affairs with, had he mentioned them all by name it may have doubled the time that he spoke. In fact, it is quite possible that he didn’t even know her name. What was this woman’s profession you may ask? She was an actress in adult films…which is a toned down way of saying she’s a porn star. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that if she returned to her “place of employment” and bent over something, she would be back in business….

The bottom line is, I don’t feel that I needed an apology from Tiger Woods. He is not my husband, nor an idol for my children, so his actions do not affect me in any way. I do reserve the right, however, to view him as a dirty dog and I will do just that……